The other day I had a conversation that got me thinking about how powerful the past is to shaping your self-concept – which is the image you hold of yourself and what you feel worthy of and what you don’t.
I’ve always known that the past was powerful, yet I didn’t realize how much power I was giving it by trying to outrun and hide from it.
I can see now that outrunning and hiding from past memories brought great gifts. I learned how to be driven, motivated and ambitious.
However, I always knew, at some level, this ambition and constant drive was a mechanism I was using to not feel or acknowledge the lack I was feeling.
It made logical sense for me to leave the past in the past – and outgrow...
“If you've been trying unsuccessfully to change a habit, understand that there is usually one hidden advantage or liking for that particular behavior just below your conscious awareness.” ~Hale Dwoskin
Steven Covey said it best when he said: “Our character is a composite of our habits, which form a powerful factor in our lives. Because habits are consistent, unconscious patterns, they constantly express our character and produce our effectiveness and ineffectiveness.”
Covey says that "Habits have a strong gravitational pull - and breaking deeply imbedded habitual tendencies, such as procrastination, impatience, criticalness and selfishness, involve more than just mere willpower. "
So what do...
“Pain is not wrong. Reacting to pain as wrong initiates the trance of unworthiness. The moment we believe something is wrong, our world shrinks and we lose ourselves in the effort to combat the pain. ~Tara Brach
I remember years back, when I had about a year of coaching under my belt, I hired a photographer to take some pictures of me for the new website I was creating.
This photographer was referred to me by a friend, and I had known that she recently got married and was going through some major transitions in her life.
For the photo shoot, she and I decided to meet in the woods near my home where we thought we could get some nice shots outside.
During the shoot, we chatted about a variety of things and our conversation eventually landed on...
“The biggest commitment you must keep is the commitment you keep to yourself.” ~Neale Donald Walsch
Do you fear being judged if you share your dreams with anyone, even yourself? Do you have resistance to writing your dreams down? If so, you may fear two things when it comes to sharing your deep heart's desire:
1) Hearing your own critical voice judging you.
2) Hearing judgement from other people (especially people closest to you) and losing their love if you step into a new, authentic version of yourself.
I read recently that one of the top 6 fears that people have about succeeding and changing is the fear of losing love.
Therefore you may stay stuck for fear of making others feel...
It is not because things are difficult that we do not dare. It is because we do not dare that they are difficult. ~ Seneca ~
Nothing will build your confidence faster than to have courage in the face of fear. To act when your knees are shaking and your palms are sweating. At that moment, you are taking a BIG leap of Faith and you have no idea what will happen. You are forced to jump and pray a net will be found!
I bet you've had experiences where you've looked back on something you did that was scary and thought, “Wow, I can’t believe I did that!”. Those are the moments when you get to see what you’re really made of, especially when you did something (or many things) that you...
“We work on ourselves in order to help others, but also we help others in order to work on ourselves.” — Pema Chödrön
The biggest misconception many people have is - believing that those that are called to teach and coach have it all figured out. We don’t. That’s the point.
Oftentimes I’ve found myself begrudging my circumstances - whether present or past thinking: “This isn’t right. This shouldn’t be happening to me. Haven’t I transcended and outgrown this by now?”
These questions always served me a nice big piece of humble pie.
I’ve learned through direct experience that if you are committed to being of true service in this world, then...
“I am a little pencil in God's hands. He does the thinking. He does the writing. He does everything and sometimes it is really hard because it is a broken pencil and He has to sharpen it a little more.” ~Mother Teresa
I remember reading somewhere that a high quality of life has to do with what you take off your plate than what you add onto it.
It is true. Removing things off your plate both externally in your outer world and internally in your inner world is truly the KEY to living authentically.
We all know how awesome it feels to purge, clear out your closets and clear space on your calendar for new things to show up in your life.
Yet, what most often...
"To walk in nature is to witness a thousand miracles." ~Mary Davis
Have you ever wondered if your self worth fluctuates?
It's an interesting question - and when I googled to see if anyone else had written about the topic, inevitably what popped up were suggestions for searches and articles about self-esteem fluctuating - nothing about self worth.
This is so interesting because I've written about Self Worth vs. Self Esteem and the differences between the two. Self worth doesn't fluctuate. It is YOU at your core - your birthright - who you "are". Self esteem does fluctuate because it's based on what you "do". In a other words - self worth is internal - self esteem is all...
"I ain't settling for just getting by. I've had enough "so so" for the rest of my life. Tired of shooting too low, so raise the bar high. Just enough ain't enough this time. I ain't settling for anything less than everything!" ~Lyrics from Ainít Settlin, Sugarland
How many times have you felt like your heart and soul have urged you to explore the MORE within - yet a part of you crops up to remind you to: "Don't even think about it - it's not meant for you, stay where you are, youíre safer here..."?
If you take the word Settle - and explore the opposite of it, (thanks to www.opposite-word.com) you find the words: "confuse, mix up, unsettle".
No wonder it feels scary to...
“Don't aim at success - the more you aim at it and make it a target, the more you are going to miss it. For success, like happiness, cannot be pursued; it must ensue... as the unintended side-effect of one's personal dedication to a course greater than oneself.” ~Victor Frankl
This quote above is very profound and one I suggest you may want to print-out and contemplate. And what a perfect time to contemplate what success really means to you – as we are embarking on another year – a year full of hope, anticipation, and excitement – and another year and chance to ‘get it right’.
Yet, trying to be successful, or trying to ‘get it right’, can not only cause loads of pressure, tension and...