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Self Help Addiction

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Coaching doesn't make sick people well - it helps healthy people become extra-ordinary. ~Thomas Leonard

Last week I had a conversation with a close friend about how we all can get into the trap of self-help addiction and believing that paying attention to your growth and evolution means fixing yourself.

In other words, there is something wrong with you that needs to be helped, (a.k.a. self-help).

Not true. There isn't anything wrong with you - and nothing that needs to be "fixed". 

Even Iyanla Vanzant, who has her own show on OWN called Iyanla Fix My Life - insists that she doesn't fix anyone's life but gives people the tools to do it themselves.

That is really the key:  realizing you have the power vs. believing that you need to fixed or changed in...

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Feeling Guilty For Wanting MORE?

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“Believe you can and you're halfway there.” ~Theodore Roosevelt

In your life you’ve most likely doubted yourself, your abilities, and your overall self-worth at some point, right?

Well, that’s actually a really good thing (say what?!?) because if you didn’t feel self-doubt, or struggle with your overall worthiness, then you wouldn’t be living up to your full potential and experiencing the growth and evolution that your soul longs for.

See, your dreams, desires, and adventures that you long manifest into reality - have absolutely nothing to do with your overall worthiness or feeling deserving, or ‘good enough’ - but in actuality, have everything to do with what your soul came to experience and needs...

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Pursuing Your Calling - You Have What It Takes

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You've been given the perfect life to teach what you most need to learn. The greatest teachers are given the greatest challenges. Accept that your life will never be perfect but the circumstances are perfect for you to continually evolve yourself while you continually help to evolve others. 

You know you're being called to do more and to be more in your life.  There is a nagging feeling that just won't let you go.  No matter how many times you've tried to ignore it -or settle for a regular existence - it nags at you whispering - There Is Something More...

I get it....your calling can feel like a haunting.  

Maybe you've explored what your MORE is.  Maybe you've taken a course, attended a workshop, or you've taken action on your...

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Courage To Make A Change

Are you on the verge of making a big change in your life/work?  Or, do you have a deep desire to make a big change?  

Do you know exactly what you want to see and have change - or is that vision fuzzy?  

Either way, if you know in your heart and soul that a change is needed - it's having the courage to take the steps to make that change come to life - that is the biggest challenge.  

One day, as I was contemplating making my own big changes - I stumbled upon a card in the store that simply read:  Trust In Yourself.  As I backed up to look more closely at it, the whole title read:  “Trust In Yourself to Make a New Beginning”

Intrigued, I opened the card and read through some beautiful wording that described how difficult, yet exciting, it can...

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Making Time For Yourself

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“Your time is limited, so don't waste it living someone else's life. Don't be trapped by dogma - which is living with the results of other people's thinking. Don't let the noise of other's opinions drown out your own inner voice. And most important, have the courage to follow your heart and intuition. They somehow already know what you truly want to become. Everything else is secondary.”  ~Steve Jobs

I think you’d agree that time is your greatest commodity.  It’s a true gift to have more time for yourself, your life, with your family and for the pursuit of your creative aspirations for your continual evolution and growth as a person. 

Yet, what most don’t realize is – what you value in life is displayed by...

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How To Overcome Regret

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“Dwell in possibility”  ~Emily Dickinson

When you make the all important decision to live the life you’re destined to live, you will go through a myriad of emotions.  One biggie of an emotion is the “should-a, could-a, would-a” effect – where you feel “if only” I had done this – or “if only” they had done that – or “if only” it could of worked out this way.    

Having regrets about your past and/or present circumstances, not only hold you back from manifesting your highest vision, but regrets also drain your energy and keep you steeped in old self-defeating programming and patterns. 

To regret is to feel a sense of loss, disappointment, and an...

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3 Steps To UpLevel Your Life

“Those who do not move do not notice their chains.” ~Rosa Luxemburg

I can only imagine if you’re anything like me, that you consistently feel a need to evolve and grow, to expand and ensure that you’re realizing your full potential.

I would also guess that you’re someone who at each level you aspire to, you run into new hold-backs, new limiting belief systems that you didn’t realize were there. Beliefs that run deep. Beliefs that wreak havoc on your best laid plans to go forward into your future without limits!

You’re most likely learning that, as you go forward and continue to allow yourself permission to follow your heart, that you’re realizing that your inner critic (that voice inside who tells you can't, you won't, you're not good...

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Setting Clear Intentions

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"Everything has beauty, but not everyone sees it." ~ Confucius

Let's imagine that together you and I worked on creating some intentions for all areas of your life. In our process together, I would have you start with what it is that you deeply desire but rather than focus on the specifics around the desire, I would rather have you focus on the ESSENCE of your desire.

My favorite definition of the word essence is: the characteristic or intrinsic feature of a thing, which determines its identity; fundamental nature.

If you think about that - the fundamental nature - the identity - of something...you really get down to the CORE and the Truth of whatever it is that you desire.

And what's so cool about setting intentions via the coaching process is: when we...

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Fear of Loss

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Many people die with their music still in them. Why is this so? Too often it is because they are always getting ready to live. Before they know it, time runs out.  ~Oliver Wendell Holmes

Steeped in the need for growth and feeling worthy of experiencing and having MORE in your life – comes an,  almost always unconscious, ambivalence around wanting to grow but being afraid of it at the same time.

What's at the core of this is?  F.E.A.R.  

Sure, there is fear of change, fear of the unknown and going to a new level and what that will require of you.  But at a deeper level - there is a fear of losing what you have now - when you gain something new.  

In other words - the fear of loss.

This fear is there because of a...

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Moving Beyond Your Limits

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"Rise above yourself." ~Thomas Leonard

As the quote referenced above,"Rise above yourself", means to push yourself past what you think is possible for you and go deeper within to continually discover your Real Potential.

The goal is to go deeper into what you have no idea could possibly happen but you secretly hope it would/could.

I remember learning this lesson at the gym - when one of the instructors explained why we did 5 very intense rounds of the same exercise for only 30 seconds and then had us rest in between.

He explained the philosophy of pushing yourself very hard - as hard as you can for 30 seconds and what what you realize is: most likely you'll start at a level 7 and realize - as you push yourself beyond your limits - that by the...

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