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Pressure of Trying To Be Perfect

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"You are loved just for being who you are - just for existing.  You don't have to do anything to earn it.  Your shortcomings, your lack of self-esteem, physical perfection, or social and economic success - none of that matters.  No one can take this love away from you and it will always be here."  ~Ram Dass, "Be Love Now"

One myth is:  perfection is attainable. 

It definitely is not. 

What’s attainable is:  embracing and loving your perfections and your imperfections at the same time.

A second myth is:  people in the helping profession – such as coaches, therapists, healers, etc. - whom are committed to "the work"- have it all figured out. 

They/we definitely do not. 

In fact, those...

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Feeling Worthy of Receiving

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“As we let our light shine, we unconsciously give other people permission to do the same. As we are liberated from our own fear, our presence actually liberates others.”  ~Marianne Williamson 

Years ago I heard a great statement by Seth Godin in relation to the dawning of a new year where he said:  “You don't need a new plan for the year, you need a commitment.”

How true.  Before you make a plan, make sure that you’re committed to what you plan to do. 

Also, at the same time, make sure that you’re committed to changing course and being flexible to where the path takes you vs. feeling as if you need to control each step because it’s part of your “plan”. 

We all...

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What (and Who!) Determines Your Self Worth?

 Appearance has so little to do with where we should get our confidence from. But everywhere we turn we’re told we’re supposed to look this certain way. I have looked at myself in the mirror and though, This is how you look. Embrace that and move on. Confidence has nothing to do with how you look. I feel happiest when I’m with friends and I’m working really hard. ~Amy Schumer

The other day I discovered an empowering and inspirational speech that comedian Amy Schumer gave at The Gloria Awards a few years back.  The speech spoke to the importance of not relying on external sources for your confidence of self worth.  

You most likely know about Amy Schumer, she is comedy’s “it” girl not only because she's incredibly...

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Changing Your Personal Narrative

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The other day I had a conversation that got me thinking about how powerful the past is to shaping your self-concept – which is the image you hold of yourself and what you feel worthy of and what you don’t. 

I’ve always known that the past was powerful, yet I didn’t realize how much power I was giving it by trying to outrun and hide from it. 

I can see now that outrunning and hiding from past memories brought great gifts.  I learned how to be driven, motivated and ambitious. 

However, I always knew, at some level, this ambition and constant drive was a mechanism I was using to not feel or acknowledge the lack I was feeling. 

It made logical sense for me to leave the past in the past – and outgrow...

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Facing A Crossroads In Life

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“Trust your own heart. It knows the right way.”


Decisions, decisions. They are certainly hard to make – especially when they pertain to really important things. Things that are aligned with you experiencing a brighter future.

Today I’m sharing a personal story with you that provides a real-world example of what it looks, and feels like, to make a decision from your head vs. your heart.   

Years back, when I hit a wall in my career, I prayed for a miracle that would show me the way out, and into a career that I loved. 

I still remember the day that I found the answer to my prayer as I googled a term that brought-up a link to an upcoming workshop that was focused on making an authentic career transition...

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What Is Life Mirroring Back To You?

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One of the most common, and biggest untruths that I see in coaching work with clients is when someone believes their power is outside of them.  This belief shows up in a variety of ways depending on where you are in your life stage.

Take work for example. 

If you work for someone else, you no doubt have felt, at one point or another, that your employer/your boss has power over your well-being.  Your fear may be that if you mess up or disappoint them, you'd be fired and your own sense of safety and security would be threatened.

Or say you work for yourself. 

You may feel this belief even stronger - where you don't have the consistent income (a.k.a Source) of an employer plopping money into your account every other week. ...

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Keeping Commitments To Yourself

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“The biggest commitment you must keep is the commitment you keep to yourself.” ~Neale Donald Walsch

Do you fear being judged if you share your dreams with anyone, even yourself?  Do you have resistance to writing your dreams down?   If so, you may fear two things when it comes to sharing your deep heart's desire:   

1) Hearing your own critical voice judging you. 

2) Hearing judgement from other people (especially people closest to you) and losing their love if you step into a new, authentic version of yourself.

I read recently that one of the top 6 fears that people have about succeeding and changing is the fear of losing love. 

Therefore you may stay stuck for fear of making others feel...

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Knowing Who You Can Trust

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If you’ve ever had a struggle or a really difficult circumstance in your life, you most likely wanted to share the struggle with someone you trust and who can help you through it. 

Yet, at one point (or many points), you may have found yourself feeling worse after sharing your struggle with someone who didn't support you in the way you needed them to.  

In this discussion with Oprah, Brene Brown speaks to this exact situation in what she refers to as: 6 People Who Do Not Deserve To Hear Your Shame Story.  

It’s powerful to realize that you may have chosen to be vulnerable with the wrong person.  You may have chosen to be open with someone who hasn’t learned to be open with themselves.

So often on your...

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How To Make Yourself A Priority

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Your heart knows the way.  Run in that direction.  ~Rumi

Oftentimes there is a big disconnect between what your heart  deeply desires and what your head tells you that you’re capable and worthy of.   

It’s one thing to say what you want and it’s another thing to believe with every cell of your being that you’re worthy of receiving it. 

In coaching sessions, we always go for the root of what is holding someone back.  What we most often discover is something that’s totally unconscious. 

The challenges faced usually sounds something like this:  “I don’t know what it is – I just can’t do it. I know what I want, I can see it, I journal around it, write ideas in...

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Fear of Being Arrogant

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The other day I had a conversation with a friend who shared how worried she was about a health issue reoccurring in her life.  She was having some symptoms that felt familiar and started to go into a spiral of fear that her former health issues were returning. 

We talked about her shifting her thoughts.  Thinking positive.  Letting go of negative images and envisioning a good outcome.

This friend is like a fish to water when it comes to embracing a more positive mindset. Yet,  for some reason she was resisting this approach.

She prayed about it and then prayed some more.  Then, all of a sudden, it dawned on her. She realized that she’s held onto a lifelong pattern of being worried, fearful and scared when it...

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