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Stuck In A Past Pattern

Photo by Tamara Menzi on Unsplash

You hold the key to set yourself free from anything that is holding you back.  Now, knowing that in your head and feeling it in your heart - is another story! 

When you feel trapped in a past pattern where you want things to change but you can’t seem to figure out how to bring about those changes - this is an indication of, what I refer to as, a worth block.

A worth block is when you try to make a change in a certain area of your life and you feel an energetic block that keeps you from what you truly want. This block is something that you can’t put your finger on.  It’s unconscious and it’s frustrating to not know what the block exactly is or why it's keeping you stuck.  

To help shed...

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Breaking Old Habits

Photo by Kinga Cichewicz on Unsplash

If you've been trying unsuccessfully to change a habit, understand that there is usually one hidden advantage or liking for that particular behavior just below your conscious awareness.”  ~Hale Dwoskin

Steven Covey said it best when he said:  “Our character is a composite of our habits, which form a powerful factor in our lives.  Because habits are consistent, unconscious patterns, they constantly express our character and produce our effectiveness and ineffectiveness.” 

Covey says that "Habits have a strong gravitational pull - and breaking deeply imbedded habitual tendencies,  such as procrastination, impatience, criticalness and selfishness, involve more than just mere willpower. "

So what do...

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Courage In The Face of Fear

Photo by Toa Heftiba on Unsplash

It is not because things are difficult that we do not dare.  It is because we do not dare that they are difficult.  ~ Seneca ~

Nothing will build your confidence faster than to have courage in the face of fear.  To act when your knees are shaking and your palms are sweating.  At that moment, you are taking a BIG leap of Faith  and you have no idea what will happen.  You are forced to jump and pray a net will be found! 

I bet you've had experiences where you've looked back on something you did that was scary and thought, “Wow, I can’t believe I did that!”.  Those are the moments when you get to see what you’re really made of, especially when you did something (or many things) that you...

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Owning Your Story

Photo by Calum Lewis on Unsplash

I watched the most interesting documentary on Netflix this weekend titled:  Tell Me Who I Am.  You can watch the trailer by clicking here.

***Spoiler Alert & Disclaimer:  If you don’t want any spoilers to the documentary, stop reading now, go watch and then come back.  Also, before watching please know that the documentary discusses sexual abuse and has very sensitive content.

As the trailer describes, the story is about two twin brothers, Alex and Lewis. 

At age eighteen Alex was seriously injured in a motorcycle accident and lost all his memory.  The only person he recognized when he woke up was his twin brother Marcus.  He didn’t even recognize his own mother but he knew his twin and...

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Judgement vs. Discernment

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“Make no judgments where you have no compassion.” ~Anne McCaffrey

Judgment gets a bad rap in our society.

You hear people tell us that judging is bad and you shouldn't judge another or yourself.

I agree. 

Yet in order to function in life you do need have a tool that allows you to observe behavior and make determinations that serve you and your well being.

This key is to know the difference between judging and discernment. 

Judging is making a critical observation and concluding that you are better than the person you are judging.  This is also true for how your inner critic tries to control you through judgement of yourself!  

Discernment is the act of observing someone's behavior and making...

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What Stops You From Speaking Your Truth

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Courage is what it takes to stand up and speak; courage is also what it takes to sit down and listen."  ~Winston Churchill            

I've shunned myself many times for having opinions about things and for using my voice especially when others weren't in agreement about what I had to say.  In fact, I've had others get down-right angry at me for expressing my feelings and opinions.

What I've realized is:  having opinions and using your voice in a world full of people who want you to conform is like trying to swim upstream.  It's hard and it takes a lot of strength and courage!

Feeling like you're swimming upstream is where I see so much resistance coming up for clients who know they are...

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Stop Hiding From Yourself and Others

Photo by Kinga Cichewicz on Unsplash

"If the shoe doesn't fit, must we change the foot?" ~Gloria Steinem

To me, this quote by Gloria Steinem is incredibly powerful.

It speaks to what most of us are taught to do from a very early age, change and hide who we really are in order to "fit-into" situations that are uncomfortable but needed for our survival.

Have you ever considered that the parts of you that you thought were your hold-backs were just protection mechanisms?

Have you ever considered that you needed to hide away parts of you that are LIGHT, bright, capable, strong, and glowing - in order to not outshine or intimidate others?

Consider Gloria's question: "If the shoe doesn't fit, must we change the foot?"

Unfortunately most of us are taught unconsciously to...

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Who Is In Your Inner Circle?

Photo by Priscilla Du Preez on Unsplash

“You are the average of the five people you spend the most time with.”  ~Jim Rohn                     

Most of us have a deep down fear of not only disappointing others, but more accurately, having them abandon us if we change.   

What I’ve learned is:  relationships cannot be a default in your life.  You can’t allow people to be around you just because they’ve been around you for years.

As Jim Rohn’s statement says above, you truly are the average of the five people you spend the most time with.  Now, the BIG question is:  does that statement inspire you or scare...

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Fear of Being Disappointed (Again!)

Photo by Lukas Hartmann from Pexels

“When you find your path, you must not be afraid. You need to have sufficient courage to make mistakes. Disappointment, defeat, and despair are the tools God uses to show us the way.” ― Paulo Coelho, Brida

The other day I had one of the best conversations with a new client whom, at the time, was trying to determine if now is the right time for her to start on the path of deeper Self discovery in life, work and relationships.

In our brief 20-minute call, she and I were able to determine the depth of her indecision and feeling overwhelmingly stuck. The key moment in the call was when she admitted: “I’m afraid to try again!”.  She was so surprised when the words were uttered out of her mouth as she had no...

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Conflicting Priorities

“Dance first, think later.” ~Samuel Beckett

When you have an important decision to make – do you tend to write out lists of the pros and cons – and consider which direction a yes could take you and which direction a no could take you? 

Ahh, the beauty of being an over thinker J

Ambivalence, on the surface is defined as:  the state of having simultaneous, sometimes conflicting behaviors towards something – like feeling happy and sad at the same time. 

The same is true for more unconscious things – like the classic – saying you want to get more fit and work-out more – and then finding yourself sitting on the couch watching tv. 

Ambivalence is normal to feel – especially when you’re making a big decision....

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