Do you ever wonder what the difference is between your self-esteem and your self-worth?
The two are very closely aligned like brother and sister are in the bloodline.
Yet, there is also a major distinction to be made between the two - and, as a disclaimer, whatever I describe below is based on my own experience and beliefs and certainly isn't the only way in which to view the distinction.
Your self-esteem is how you feel about yourself based on your actions. It's what you have control over. Its how you feel about yourself from the inside/out. Overall, are you proud of yourself for who you are, what you stand for and what actions you take and don't take based on the values that you choose to orient your life around?
Your self-worth, has a much more spiritual...
The other day I realized that I repeated (yet again) a past pattern that has caused me enormous pain and confusion.
As I sat there feeling that all too familiar punch in the gut pain, I thought: “Geez, I must not have much self-respect to keep doing this to myself…”.
My head then began to take me on a rollercoaster ride of judgement – where I began to feel worse *thinking* thoughts such as: “Other stronger, more worldly women - would never continually subject themselves to this type of pain. You must be weak – and they simply have more self-respect for themselves.”
So, then as I habitually do, I went outside myself to get a better understanding of what the outside world could tell me about self-judgement....
If there is anything in your sabotager’s toolkit that will squelch your dreams the quickest - it will be comparing yourself to others – and looking for evidence on how they are better, more qualified, more creative, more successful, more ‘in the know’ than you.
And if there is anything that I could stress when it comes to your career/business (and life), it would be this: Be You and only YOU. No one else can ‘do’ you, or do what you do the way you do it, period!
Yet, the sad truth is, many folks want to copy other people’s models, plans, and ‘ways’ of doing things and simply be fed their ideas, to get a quick fix – and have a band-aid be put on their most immediate problem. The problem could be...
Most of us are stuck in unconscious thought patterns that don't serve and keep us stuck in the past or the future – and how most of us don’t value the NOW.
We all hear this message “out there” in various forms and messages. Be Present. Stay in the moment. All we have is NOW. The present is a present.
True, but how do you apply these concepts to your life? How do you realize what being in the NOW actually gives to your life right now?
The whole concept of being in the NOW is to give yourself the gift (a.k.a. present) of connecting with Truth vs. listening to the voice in your head. We all have the mind chatter that wants to keep feeding off the past – or focusing on what may (or may not) happen in the...
I heard the other that day that we humans process 125-250 words per minute when we are communicating with others - whether we’re speaking or are being spoken to. Yet, when we think in our own minds, we form thoughts that are 1000-3000 words per minute.
Pretty incredible huh?
A couple of lessons come out of this Truth.
Number one is - when you aren’t fully present when you are communicating with another - your mind is very active. This means that you aren’t listening to what the other is truly saying - but *thinking* about what you’re either going to say next- or making assumptions based on what they’re saying. In either scenario, you are more in your own mind than you are in the present moment.
Same is true for the second Truth which...
Twenty years from now, you will be more disappointed by the things you didn't do than by the ones you did do. So throw off the bowlines. Sail away from the safe harbor. Catch the trade winds in your sails. Explore.Dream. Discover"
-- MARK TWAIN
Several years ago when I was in a major transition period of reinventing my life and my work, I was feeling a need for something, I just wasn't sure what that something was.
I had just finished up work with a coach to help me with some tactical things - and was now at a stage where I knew I needed some support and some encouragement, but in a much deeper way.
One day while listening to a radio show, I heard a woman who was being interviewed about her personal history and background, and her coaching philosophy. I...
When was the last time you sat down and acknowledged yourself for what youve accomplished, overcome, realized about yourself, contributed to others, etc. - in the last few months, and even the last several years?
Do you have a memory of this or is the answer - not so much. Or never?
If you havent been making it a ritual to acknowledge yourself and how much progress and contribution you make every day and every year - then I highly recommend making this a new habit in your life.
Most of us were brought up to believe that to acknowledge yourself for anything means that youre a show-off, know-it-all, or youre self-absorbed. And as a result of this, there is a subconscious fear and message running like a tape drive in your mind saying whatever you do, its never going to be...
We all have a story we tell ourselves about how worthy or unworthy we feel based on past and current circumstances.
And, most everyone looks to create something in the future to transcend the circumstances that made you (or are making you) feel unworthy...and....hold onto the circumstances that you feel give you worth.
But have you ever considered that trying to create your life keeps you stuck in what you *think* you *should* do and have vs. allowing what is meant for you to happen?
The past two years have opened my own eyes to how mind driven I’ve been. How, even though, I’ve been following spiritual practice and “teachers”, I was still more committed to giving my mind the power and trying to control what happens vs. allowing what is meant to happen,...
“Self sabotage is when we say we want something and we go about making sure it doesn’t happen” ~Alyce P. Cornyn-Selby
You know what it is that you deeply want. You have it on a vision board or maybe you’ve written it down.
Regardless of the way in which you’ve formulated your vision, you have a good idea of what you yearn to manifest in your life.
Then why, do you sometimes take two steps forward and one (maybe two, three or twenty!) steps back just when you’re beginning to feel great, make progress and see results?
Self sabotage could be at play.
When you find yourself taking steps forward towards your vision and then suddenly, or gradually, find yourself stopping, or backing off considerably - give thought and consideration to there may be a...
Michael Singer, author and spiritual teacher said it best:
"Most of us think that nothing good is ever going to happen to us unless I make it happen. We don’t realize we think this way, but we do. We are scared inside - and we have all these concepts of how things need to be for us to be okay. We think life is a battle, a fight. Thinking life is against me and I need to make it for me. The Truth is, life does a good job by itself. Life is pretty intelligent. No human interest with the miraculous that life is.”
I don’t know about you but this statement summed up my approach to life - believing that my life should look a certain way and meet MY expectations - and if it doesn’t, something is wrong - or that I’m a failure for not being...