Fear of Being Too Much

 “It is our light, not our darkness, that most frightens us.”  ~Marianne Williamson

If you’ve been on the self-discovery path for a some time, there is no doubt that you’ve come up against, wrestled with and hopefully transformed your “not enough” beliefs.

 And, even though each new level that you go to, you’ll inevitably face new “not enough” beliefs, rest assured that you’ll no doubt continue to tackle these as you have the tools and awareness you’ll need. 

 Yet, what about when you face “too much” beliefs? 

“Too much” beliefs don’t get talked about as much – but they are just as prevalent on the Claim Your Worth!® path – and can be just as debilitating to your progress.

 These beliefs are what you bump up against when you hear your inner critic say to you “Who do you think you are?” These beliefs are the opposite of “not enough” but are stemmed from the same branch. 

Common inner dialogue can sound something like this:  ”Better not outshine others – or get too pretty, too thin, too successful – if you do, others won’t like you.” 

Often, these beliefs (a.k.a. fears) don’t see the light of day until you conquer your “not enough” beliefs. But they are there – and they will do everything in their power to avoid you from becoming aware that they exist – and are holding you back from your true destiny. 

Keep in mind these beliefs and fears aren’t out to hurt you.  They were formed long ago to protect you.  Most likely, they were formed to keep you connected to others who may have been fearful of your light and power and been more comfortable with you believing that you weren’t enough. 

So, how do you recognize if there is a fear within you that is afraid of being too much?  How do you uncover if, deep down, you are more committed to staying small and hidden than being seen and shining?

Consider that the parts of you that are your greatest gifts – compassionate, empathetic, friendly, funny, caring, giving, etc. - could also be the parts of you that you formed in order to become the exact opposite of someone who held an authority position in your life – and who you decided you were never, ever, ever going to be like. 

 This person may be someone that you considered selfish, greedy, outspoken, vain, a know-it-all, always needing the spotlight or all the attention.  Whatever it is – you couldn’t stand it – and made a decision to become the exact opposite of them.

If you can relate with this – first take a moment to appreciate this individual in your life because they allowed you to form incredible qualities.  And, although these qualities allow you to graciously be a giver – they could also be so skewed to the extreme that you find yourself never being able to receive, never being able to shine in the light, and never being able to get the attention – because that’s just not who you are.

 The fear of being too much is stemmed in our identity –and it’s again part of the same branch as your “not enough” beliefs.  It’s time to look at the fears beyond not feeling like enough and go into the fears of being too much. 

Simply ask yourself these three fundamental questions: 

Question 1:  If I was/am more committed to hiding in the shadows of not feeling like enough, what would my motivation be? 

Question 2:  If I actually became what others may consider to be too much – too powerful, too influential, too sexy, too bold, too wild, too independent, too gorgeous, too successful, too radiant, too opinionated, too smart, too well known, too demanding, etc. – who would be scared by this besides me?

Question 3:  If I actually broke out from the limiting beliefs that I hold and became who I know I was created to BE , who, and what am I afraid of losing?

Give yourself permission to contemplate these questions – and remember, as always, be gentle and honest with yourself. 


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