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How To Stop Over-Giving

Feeling worthy of your own time and attention is a skill that most need to learn and incorporate into everyday life.  Society teaches that you must do good, give to others, and be a good person.  

Yet, you can’t give what you don’t already have (a.k.a. energy, feeling of fullness and love, etc.) - when you’re running on an empty tank. 

You know how good it feels to share your gifts and talents with others and how they benefit. Yet, when you over-give, you can experience burnout from overgiving and overextending yourself.  This is when it is vital to look underneath the surface to see where you may be overgiving, overcompensating, overworking, etc. - and what your true motive is.  

Oftentimes when you are overextending...

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Pressure of Trying To Be Perfect

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"You are loved just for being who you are - just for existing.  You don't have to do anything to earn it.  Your shortcomings, your lack of self-esteem, physical perfection, or social and economic success - none of that matters.  No one can take this love away from you and it will always be here."  ~Ram Dass, "Be Love Now"

One myth is:  perfection is attainable. 

It definitely is not. 

What’s attainable is:  embracing and loving your perfections and your imperfections at the same time.

A second myth is:  people in the helping profession – such as coaches, therapists, healers, etc. - whom are committed to "the work"- have it all figured out. 

They/we definitely do not. 

In fact, those...

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Courage to Move Forward

The beautiful thing about having a deep desire to find your life's calling through your work's expression is - it's a wonderful excuse and catalyst to grow personally as well as professionally.  

If you think about it, many of the decisions you've made in the past most likely have come from what you thought you *should* do in certain areas vs. what you would have done if you didn't have any fear. 

Isn't it awesome when you realize that you don't have to live by your *shoulds* but rather by what your heart is urging you to do?   Think of it this way: *should* aligns with obligation and obligation stems from feeling undeserving. 

However, doing what you love and what would make your heart sing and bring you joy may have  hesitation around it too. ...

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Feeling Worthy of Receiving

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“As we let our light shine, we unconsciously give other people permission to do the same. As we are liberated from our own fear, our presence actually liberates others.”  ~Marianne Williamson 

Years ago I heard a great statement by Seth Godin in relation to the dawning of a new year where he said:  “You don't need a new plan for the year, you need a commitment.”

How true.  Before you make a plan, make sure that you’re committed to what you plan to do. 

Also, at the same time, make sure that you’re committed to changing course and being flexible to where the path takes you vs. feeling as if you need to control each step because it’s part of your “plan”. 

We all...

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How To Not Be Hard On Yourself

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 “If you want a new outcome, you will have to break the habit of being yourself, and reinvent a new self.” ~Joe Dispenza

Last week during a grueling, yet energizing workout,  I huffed and puffed and heard my quiet, nurturing voice inside me say:  “You’re doing great, keep going.” And, at that moment, I remember thinking:  “God, if you’re so nice to me, how am I ever going to ever get anything done?” 

That quiet voice inside has always been there yet I never allowed myself to hear it as often as I do now. 

In the past, when I was a self-proclaimed ‘workhorse’, the voice that got me to do things, get things done, and achieve - was the voice in...

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Live A Life True To Yourself

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"You get courage by taking actions that are inconsistent with the reality that you're living in right now. By taking actions that are unrecognizable to you, you will ensure that you live a full life, using up all of yourself and all of your potential. Otherwise psychological laziness lands us in the cowardly, resigned vibration that can only bring us more of the same."~Debbie Ford

One of the hardest things to learn in life is how to embrace and accept yourself as you are without feeling as if you need to change in order to be accepted by others.

The reason why embracing, accepting and being yourself can feel so hard and challenging is because we all have the basic human need to feel loved and belong. 

Think about the inner conflict that...

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What (and Who!) Determines Your Self Worth?

 Appearance has so little to do with where we should get our confidence from. But everywhere we turn we’re told we’re supposed to look this certain way. I have looked at myself in the mirror and though, This is how you look. Embrace that and move on. Confidence has nothing to do with how you look. I feel happiest when I’m with friends and I’m working really hard. ~Amy Schumer

The other day I discovered an empowering and inspirational speech that comedian Amy Schumer gave at The Gloria Awards a few years back.  The speech spoke to the importance of not relying on external sources for your confidence of self worth.  

You most likely know about Amy Schumer, she is comedy’s “it” girl not only because she's incredibly...

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Stuck In A Past Pattern

Photo by Tamara Menzi on Unsplash

You hold the key to set yourself free from anything that is holding you back.  Now, knowing that in your head and feeling it in your heart - is another story! 

When you feel trapped in a past pattern where you want things to change but you can’t seem to figure out how to bring about those changes - this is an indication of, what I refer to as, a worth block.

A worth block is when you try to make a change in a certain area of your life and you feel an energetic block that keeps you from what you truly want. This block is something that you can’t put your finger on.  It’s unconscious and it’s frustrating to not know what the block exactly is or why it's keeping you stuck.  

To help shed...

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Having An Abundance Mindset

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“When you focus on being a blessing, God makes sure that you are always blessed in abundance.”  ~~ Joel Osteen

Have you ever considered that you may feel uncomfortable receiving and having more than you need?  Therefore, you only ask for what you need vs. what you truly want?  

Joel Osteen describes this well:  "If we ask with a cup we will receive a cup’s worth.  If we ask with a barrel we’ll receive a barrel’s worth."

So the question is:  What limits are you putting on how much you ask for and how much you are willing to receive?  

This question isn't limited to material things either.  It's more focused around how you want to feel when you consider allowing yourself to...

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Changing Your Personal Narrative

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The other day I had a conversation that got me thinking about how powerful the past is to shaping your self-concept – which is the image you hold of yourself and what you feel worthy of and what you don’t. 

I’ve always known that the past was powerful, yet I didn’t realize how much power I was giving it by trying to outrun and hide from it. 

I can see now that outrunning and hiding from past memories brought great gifts.  I learned how to be driven, motivated and ambitious. 

However, I always knew, at some level, this ambition and constant drive was a mechanism I was using to not feel or acknowledge the lack I was feeling. 

It made logical sense for me to leave the past in the past – and outgrow...

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